The Flip Flop Girl

The Imelda Marcos of Flip Flops

I have not talked too much about my current boyfriend. I've only said a few things about Thad such as he can be really arrogant; he's really horny; he's very hot; and I often wonder if we're on the same page. But he showed some spirit over the weekend and I've decided to share it with you.

As a joke, mind you, I had brought up the Jimmy Choo flip flops that I did not get for Christmas. I gave Thad the most pitiful little pout and almost had the poor lad in tears...laughing at my sorry state. He said that I already owned way too many flip flops and, with mock dismay, that it scared him. "That isn't the point!" I said, "A girl is entitled to own as many flip flops as she wants!" "You're the Imelda Marcos of flip flops!" he said. "Great pop culture reference!" was all I could say. He was starting to show a sense of humor. I equate "humor" with "human." So, I was happy.

I kept up with the flip flop demand until he relented and agreed to go shopping with me. I suppose it helped that I kept sticking my feet in his face and saying morbidly sweet things like, "Doesn't daddy want the best for his little girl's tootsies?" in the most cartoony baby voice. Or maybe he took pity on me. Or maybe it was the fact that I suggested we go out shopping and see if we might turn it into some sort of erotic adventure. Yeah, I think that's what did it. In moments, we were off to Nordy's. This initial playful demand had turned into a quest and taken on a life of its own.

It didn't seem to matter that is was the dead of winter. I swear, girls squeeze in as many chances to flaunt their feet as they can. And, even though sandals are hardly a featured item this time of year, Nordy's always has a few out on display. Fashion knows no bounds. What's a few snow flakes on your open-toe pumps, right? Yeah, the customer is always right. And we were embracing the moment. We were the customers and we were going to take control of the situation. We asked to try on just about every sandal they had available. If a woman carries herself well, she can walk right in and try on any shoe barefoot and avoid wearing those "footie" nylon socks. I was wearing nice pumps and my feet were beyond reproach. It just adds to the experience when you can press your soles down into all these shoes that you know you're not going to buy.

Ultimately, I didn't even buy any flip flops. They didn't carry Jimmy Choo's flip flops or any Jimmy Choo. But, just for fun, I ended up finding a pair of wedgies I liked. And, just at the right moment, I slid my new Fuck Me shoes on Thad's lap and asked him if he'd check to see if he liked them. As quickly as he processed that sensation, I asked him if he'd help me slip out of them. Thad was giggling a little but he went along. I was really laying on the seductress role pretty thick. Then I said, "Kiss my toes, sweetheart." And, in that very moment, we were both locked into something. We were totally zoned in. And, I guess we didn't care if someone saw us or not. Or maybe we did. It couldn't have lasted more than mere seconds but Thad dutifully kissed each toe and then looked at me with a wide grin. And, too our delicious surprise, we had been spotted. "Oh, that's cute," said our salesgirl. It was a refreshing response! She had a nose ring and was sporting flip flops herself so I guess we lucked out. But I couldn't leave well enough alone.

"My boyfriend has a foot fetish," I said, just to see what would happen. Maybe it was unfair of me but I caught myself and went for broke: "I have a thing for feet too." Was I being confrontational? Oh, I wasn't even thinking that. But our salesgirl did not miss a beat. "I think that's cool. I love feet too!" "I guess you would," I said, "being that you work in the Shoe Department." "Yeah, I guess so!" was her last response to all this. In another moment, things sort of returned back to usual. We made our purchase and were quite satisfied with our little outing which I guess it was: an outing! I "outed" both of us as being into feet and there was a pleasant result in the end! We discussed this in the car going home. Thad was so cool about it all. He didn't say anything about feeling awkward. He just rolled with it. I have to give him a lot of credit for that!

Labels: dating, erotica, feet, flip flops, foot fetish, pop culture, relationships, Writing